Short Story

** Spoilers ahead ** 

Forgiveness

Why can't you just forgive and forget?  He said he was sorry, that it was a mistake, a misunderstanding.  What's the big deal?

These words play through Sarah's head, tormenting her.  No matter what she does, or who she's with, her mothers' words inevitable pop up, ruining any chance she has at having a normal, guilt-free day.  But what is she guilty of?  Not being able to forgive.  She tries desperately to forget, but forgiveness is just beyond her reach.

Sarah is five.  She wakes from a nightmare to see her Daddy peering at her from the side of her bed.

She is ten.  She constantly hears her Daddy talk about things she doesn't really understand, but knows are inappropriate.

She is fifteen, and wants to die.  Life has let her down.  Things that should have been safe were full of hidden thorns.

Love is elusive.  She takes photographs of herself.  She shows them to anyone who will say she is pretty.  Strangers are not the only ones who see the pictures, not the only ones to say she is pretty.  She can no longer take the danger, the fear.  Daddy tries to bribe her, says he won't show the pictures to Mom if Sarah will stay with him, do certain things...

She runs to her room, and shortly after, tells her Mom everything.  This should not be kept secret, not be used against her. 

They have a family meeting.  Apologies are forthcoming.  Trying to forget.

She is sent to a psychiatrist because her family thinks she is delusional.  She knows her whole life happened, why is everyone trying to convince her she made 16 years of her life up?  How can she forget, when her memories are the only things that seem to be real anymore?  How can she forgive, when the person who apologized now denies anything ever happened.  She must have dreamed it all.

Why can't she just forgive and forget?  He said he was sorry, that it was a mistake, a misunderstanding.  What's the big deal?

Sarah won't forget.  

 But she will forgive.

Herself.

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Thanks for reading.  I wrote this in 2010, and I'm glad I kept it.  I knew I would eventually want to share it.